Comments on: Peer Analysis

By: Mr. Fowler

Mr. Fowler — Wed, 10 Oct 2007 13:37:22 +0000

Wendy,
I agree with you completely. It is really easy to tell someone that their writing is good or bad. The most important part (and one that will help improve the writing) is being able to tell people WHAT is good or WHAT is bad. I did notice that Parker made a suggestion on how to change the writing; he gave a specific sentnece or two. However, a lot of other kids have just been putting that “it stinks!” WHY DOES IT STINK???

By: Wendy

Wendy — Wed, 10 Oct 2007 12:03:45 +0000

Alot of input, but are there any examples for how the writer should have written?

P.S. I would love to come in for Science stuff…Ü

By: Tess

Tess — Mon, 08 Oct 2007 18:58:46 +0000

No, I don’t think the writer did a very good job organizing their writnig. For example when they said they went to the beach they told us some other things then went back to saying what they did at the beach. Another thing is that they should put that last paragraph as the 2 paragraph!!!!!!!!

By: peter

peter — Mon, 08 Oct 2007 18:55:09 +0000

Austin ,He did say in the begining What they did at the beach.

By: austin

austin — Mon, 08 Oct 2007 18:55:00 +0000

NO! because he said that he went to the beach then he says whatnot and said he did something eles than he said that hedid something at the beach I mean can he could of said that what he did at the beach than he could have said what he did in town.

By: kayler

kayler — Mon, 08 Oct 2007 18:54:44 +0000

Hi Mr. Fowler, whats up? Also You mite want to e-mail my mom about coming in for science because she is a nurse.

By: Zach

Zach — Mon, 08 Oct 2007 18:54:12 +0000

Mr.Fowler,

why did you talk aboout Lake Micigan then Chicogo?

By: Taylor

Taylor — Mon, 08 Oct 2007 18:53:27 +0000

Erin,
What did you think about the story?

By: Avery

Avery — Mon, 08 Oct 2007 18:53:02 +0000

Mr.fowler i’m sorry I was blaming the bad writing on you [altho youwrote it] anyway I guese I should commpare it with my writing because NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO is perfict I mean look at all my o’s I need work you ada send me to schooling jail well look on the bright side if you send me there I wont have any homework unless you tell them to give me homework but if you did I would never talk to you again!

By: Parker

Parker — Mon, 08 Oct 2007 18:52:40 +0000

No the writer did not use good orginizeation. The writer also skips topics alot.

this is my example:

“Lets go on another trip mom I said, Do you think we should .” she said I jumped up and down and yelled ” Yes”

Chicogo is a big place.